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How to get HIGH in Montreal – A field guide. What you should know, and what we can’t remember.

*** LEGAL DISCLAIMER*** Since this is new territory I’d like to appease my business partners and lawyers by noting that Connected Montreal does not provide or supply cannabis products. We do not condone the use of black market cannabis products. The use of legal cannabis products are to only be used and consumed in Canada. Consult your physician before using any cannabis products. The following experiences below are purely anecdotal… allegedly. For more information regarding weed laws, click here

Last week, on October 17th, Cannabis AKA Weed, pot, reefer… Etc became LEGAL in all of Canada. Not decriminalized or tolerated…Fully legal. Canada is the first G8 nation to do so.

While Cannabis is now legal, there are a few basic laws about smoking weed in Montreal:

-You must be be over 18 to buy or consume marijuana

-You can’t carry over 30 grams (that’s over an ounce) per person

-You can’t drive high (duh)

-You can’t smoke in smoke free zones (schools/hospitals)

Weed is regulated here in Quebec (Montreal is in Quebec) by the newly formed SQDC. The  SQDC is a government run weed store (Socialism at its finest) and is the only place you can buy LEGAL cannabis. There is only one physical store location downtown, which at the time of writing has a line around the block and a 3 hour wait to get in (this will, of course, die down). You can order online in Canada, However shipping takes 2-4 days.

Cannabis at the SQDC is sold in primarily 2 forms:  dried buds and pre-rolled joints for smoking OR oils, capsules, and sprays for oral consumption. Edibles such as cookies and gummy bears will not be sold as they are seen as a child safety hazard.

Luckily, I was able to get an order in online (the order volume has been so insane that quantity is already low.) In the name of science and R&D, I used the company Amex to deliver some legal cannabis products to our office. I ordered a sampling of 3 products: buds, spray, and oil/capsules.

Montreal Weed Guide

 

Weed College

In case you don’t listen to rap or are a mormon, here is a crash course in cannabis as it’s important to know the different types of strains and general effects  (or read what big brother says)

The most important thing to look for is THC content. For noobs, this means how much of the psychoactive compound is in the weed that makes you high.

Furthermore, there are 2 strains of cannabis that each give their own specific feeling/high: Sativa and Indica

Sativa: The THC in this strain gives you the “head high” the government says, “Its effects are usually described as potentially energizing, uplifting or mentally stimulating”

Indica : This strain gives you the “body high”. The government describes Indica as, ““Its effects are usually described as potentially calming, relaxing or sleep-inducing.“

Montreal Weed Guide

 

Hybrid : A mix of the two strains and a mix of the two highs. Most weed sold is a hybrid.

CBD Content : This is in reference to the NON-Psychoactive chemical. CBD is considered a miracle drug by many as its know to be of the the best anti-inflammatory out there. CBD doesn’t get you high, but it has many amazing medical benefits that I highly recommend (Think of it as a replacement for Advil, hangovers, and soreness from working out). Most people are excited that CBD is now legal as many use it to reduce chronic pain. CBD products and strains were the first to sell out online.

Type VS high:  ***Very important***. Smoking will always be the mild and shorter high, its also easier to control your dose. While eating (oils/sprays) is the wild wild west as you don’t really know how hard it will hit, or how long the high will last. The effects might not kick in for 2-3 hours… and the high can last 8+ hours. If you’re a novice, DON’T do the oils.

First Hand Report

I should mention my familiarity with cannabis (My parents learned a long time ago not to read this site and to just tell their friends I’m an “event planner”) I learned the lessons of the “sweet leaf” as a teenager (like most of you). During the mid to late 90’s in the US, weed was still illegal and expensive. Good bud cost more than gold, literally, and could get you arrested in most states. Regardless, there was no better way for a teen to get action from a chubby drama chick then by having weed. I smoked my fair share back in the day and still a bit now in my 30’s, so I’m no stranger to the occasional high. I thought I’d be prepared, boy was I wrong.

Test 1: Solei “Renouer

“ THC Spray $31″

Weed Spray

The SQDC website says:

This blend, in oral spray form, has a strong THC content and contains no CBD. It may give the impression of experiencing stimulating sensations, increase the desire to be around others and even create an urge to laugh. This product does not have a distinctive aroma. CAUTION! The effects may take up to two or three hours to appear. We strongly recommend beginning with a small amount and waiting a few hours before taking more, if desired.

This is the strongest and cheapest spray that is legally sold. It is also a Sativa.  I thought it would be a good idea to start at the top and work my way down… I was wrong.

At around noon, I decided to take 2 sprays on an empty stomach and began my journey. An hour later, I realized I should have taken just one spray.

I was catapulted into the the stratosphere of legal weed. Since any real productive work was thrown out the window, I decided to skip out on the office and indulge the buzz.

When your high, really high, there’s nothing better than stuffing your face. No better place to do so then Schwartz’s. Their smoked meat sandwiches are legendary and loved by all. Upon arrival, the line was down the block. Luckily, due to our Briskets and Breasts partnership, I was able to skip the line and grab a quick sandwich to go. I’d like to think this went as smooth as possible but I think everyone knew I was high, or maybe that was the paranoia kicking in?

 

The sandwich didn’t quench the beast  so like any glutton/foodie I hopped into an Uber (Please don’t drive high…) to my favorite place in Montreal, Jean Talon Market.

Jean Talon is possibly the best farmers market in North America. It’s the real deal with food you won’t see anywhere this side of the Atlantic. I’m too vain to list ALL the things I ate but highlights include: pulled pork tacos, snow crab at the raw bar, raw milk cheese samples (till they gave me dirty looks), and of course, a good pour over from the hipster kid who knew what was up and was probably high too.

I’d like to lie and say the rest of my high was a magical adventure, but I’d be lying. After stuffing my face, I took an Uber home and listened to “Sapiens” on Audible and JRE for the rest of the day. It was a far cry from the promised, “…gives the impression of experiencing stimulating sensations, increase the desire to be around others and even create an urge to laugh.”

The high had lasted well over 10 hours… Yes, 10 fuckin’ hours!

I am way too old to be that high for that long. I’ve taken edibles a bunch of times and this spray was right up there as one of my more  “memorable” weed experiences.

Learn from my mistake and only take one spray if you decide to indulge. Don’t be an idiot like me and take 2. Wait about two to three hours for the spray to kick in. I’m sure some people can handle this, if not something stronger.  Also, I don’t recommend this high for a bachelor party unless it’s a rainy day or you want to REALLY relax the rest of the afternoon. This spray is definitely not something I’d recommend before going out.

It’s important to note that for less than $1 I was high all day. The bang for your buck is off the charts. It’s clear Canada is not fucking around with weed legalization and is taking aim at the “black market” with superior products at dirt cheap prices.

It’s 11pm and I’m going to bed. I am still buzzed and defeated. Solei Renouer 1, Me 0.

Test 2 coming soon…

Posted on: 24 Oct 2018
Posted by: Grant Simon
How To Plan An Epic Montreal Bachelor Party

Let’s be honest… Planning a bachelor party can turn into a huge headache that no Advil can relieve. From dealing with different personalities to choosing the right activities, you can quickly get overwhelmed by the amount of things you need to take into account. Throw in the fact that you want the bachelor party to be in a city in a different country where you don’t speak the local language. While we understand that planning a Montreal bachelor party can seem overwhelming, if you follow a few easy steps, you’ll seamlessly plan an epic weekend full of booze and strippers.

Here’s 5 ways to make your bachelor party planning a bit easier:

Talk To The Groom   

This should be a no brainer, but you’d be surprised how many bachelor parties come to town without first consulting the guest of honor. Find out what he wants and doesn’t want out of the weekend. However, we highly recommend throwing in a surprise or two for the bachelor to keep the weekend interesting (Getting woken up with a lap dance is a great example). At the end of the day, the weekend should be about the bachelor, but we all know the other degenerates on the trip will have more fun.

Planning Bachelor Party

Send Out Invites

This may be the most important part of planning an epic bachelor party. The social dynamic of the group is critical. Some guys are loose cannons, other have a stick up their asses. The ideal group size is 10 and everyone should have a personal connection to the bachelor except for that one rich friend no has talked to since college, but pays for everything…Regardless, whatever you do, don’t invite the soon to be father-in-law. Some things need to be kept secret.

Head Count

Once you have invites go out, you need to figure out who is actually coming to Montreal. Planning for a 25 man bachelor party is much different than 4 guys. The earlier you know the head count, the better. This number usually changes as the weekend gets closer and wives read about Montreal’s “friendly” locals.

Bachelor Party Planning

Determine A Budget

A huge factor in choosing the right activities for your bachelor party group is finding a budget. We recommend determining what the sweet spot is for your group. It’s important to find a budget that doesn’t price some guys out of the weekend, while some of the big ballers don’t feel that everyone is being cheap. Ask early on in the process to find out what everyone wants to do. If you are the one in charge of the budget, you get to be a dictator. You can choose activities that you want to do, while pitching it as something that is for the good of the group. See how to do this? You’re welcome.

Call Connected Montreal

Once you’ve answered these basic questions, it’s time to give us a call and let us work together to create a customized itinerary. We’ll help you every step of the way to make sure planning your Montreal bachelor party is as easy and hassle-free as possible. Not only will you have a host that is available on call the whole weekend, you’ll be able to add any activities you want and we’ll adjust the itinerary as guys get added or drop out…Hard to do on your own.

 

Give us a call (1-877-690-4919) to plan your epic weekend in Montreal today!

Posted on: 19 Oct 2018
Posted by: Grant Simon
The Pros And Cons Of Throwing The Bachelor On Stage

If you come to Montreal on a bachelor party, stopping at a strip club is a necessary adventure. It’s fun for the whole group and you might even call it a bonding experience. There’s nothing quite like getting a lap dance from the same stripper and comparing notes with your buddy…Regardless, putting the bachelor on stage at the strip club and having various strippers humiliate him is always an option. It’s a great choice for some bachelor parties, while for others it could ruin the night. Here’s the pros and cons of throwing the bachelor on stage for a strip club show:

Strip Club Show

Pros:

It’s A Good Time

We all know that a bachelor party is never about the bachelor himself, but rather about the other guys on the trip. Seeing the bachelor get degraded and spanked on stage is hilarious to see for the rest of the guys. It’s always great for groups that like a bit more attention from the strippers or don’t take themselves too seriously.

Some Bachelors Enjoy The Attention

While we do offer a dominatrix show, this is the next best thing for those bachelors that are secretly masochists and like to be roughed up a bit. Who knows maybe they’ll discover something new about themselves…You can thank us later. There are bachelors that like to be the star of the show and this is the best way to get all of the attention in the strip club.

Memorable Send Off

Putting the bachelor on stage is certainly a memorable experience to say bye to his single years. He won’t forget his time on stage and it will give you some fond memories to reminisce about until his divorce party in 5 years.

Strip Club Show

Cons:

Unwanted Surprise

Anytime you throw the bachelor on stage, it’s a surprise (or just get him drunk enough..) Either way, it’s a bold move that could backfire tremendously. The bachelor may feel uncomfortable, but in our opinion, that’s the point of the bachelor party. He may not talk to you for the rest of the weekend, but that’s what true friends are for.

Wife’s Pissed

Whatever you do, make sure there is no evidence of the show if his fiancé is crazy. We’ve had a few women call us up about their man’s bachelor party and we tell them they have nothing to worry about…If there is evidence, you guys better have your stories straight. The pictures last a little longer than that handprint on the bachelor’s ass.

Tacky

Sure, we get it…Throwing the bachelor on stage is tacky, but that’s why we love it. It’s one of those traditional bachelor party activities that just completes the weekend. Besides, you’re not from Montreal, so tell the strippers you’re a porn star and make a fool of yourself. If you guys are all tightwads, take 30 minutes just to put gel in your hair, and enjoy staring at each other than putting the bachelor on stage is not for you. Otherwise, get ready for a good laugh.

Posted on: 09 Oct 2018
Posted by: Grant Simon